The summer holidays are… Well, they are stressful. Let’s be honest, we all have these big plans and ideas of what we will do with our kids, then we end up finding ourselves questioning our sanity, drinking wine from the bottle and counting down the days until they return to school. For real.
It’s not every day though, some days those well laid plans pan out well and everything goes smoothly, we’re relatively stress free and we have the illusion that the summer holidays are going to continue in perfect Instagram style. Yeah, right.
Anyway, I’ve set up a little daily mini blog on Facebook to share the woes and wins of parenthood! Here is a little example from last week:
Parent Summer holiday support diary: day 5
Wake up: which one? ?
First temper tantrum: ?
Plans: In a brave attempt to “get out the house and not kill the children” ?? after absolutely fuck all sleep ? with Edith who seemed to have picked up Reuben’s tummy bug, head to Sewerby Hall where they can run, jump, play, learn… ??
Edith was up half the night ?, by which I mean she started at 12am, refused to go back to sleep until 1am and then woke again at 3am, came into our bed and essentially latched herself on to my boob until 6.30am where I gave her free rein of my bedroom and turned on Zootropolis God you see a daily theme here ????), only vaguely aware (and interested) that she was tearing shit out of the bedside draw.???
She cried and scowled ?? pretty much constantly between 7am and 10am when we left for Sewerby Hall. Can anyone explain to me why it takes so fucking long to leave one place and visit another with children ?? If I want to go out, I put my clothes and bit of slap on, find a pair of shoes and I leave ??. If I want to leave with children, I seem to be stuck in a cycle of weeing, pooing, taking clothes off, putting clothes on, eating and drinking. What the fuck?????
When we arrived at Sewerby Hall ?, after almost constant fighting and whining in the car? (proving that I needed that flask of coffee☕️), Edie set the tone by slipping on the wooden play steps and cracking her face on the floor?. She screamed. She bled. I felt guilty. Shitballs.??
After I managed to soothe her (with a freddo?) we moved on from the play area, to have a look at the magic show??, which she absolutely REFUSED to sit for, so while the boys watched the magic show with my mum (complete with Reuben whining about how he didn’t like the noise) we went for a walk around the country house?. Which was beautiful, they even gave me a bizarre bum-bag style seat to shove her on leaving me feeling like a horse ??? who’d just been saddled, though it was remarkably comfy!??
The day continued with smatters of fun✊? but buckets of bitching??and wonderful phrases from Toby like “I just like breaking stuff”… After he broke stuff.? When we finally got lunch some absolute bellend ?? decided to walk past Edith, who was having a screaming fit for the bajillonth time, and loudly exclaimed “Oh for God’s sake” as she exited the cafe. ??The only reason I didn’t follow her and give her a piece of my mind was because I am mature and refined… And I couldn’t see which way she went. Ball bag.
Just before we left, miles away from the toilets??, Toby completed the experience by announcing loudly “I NEED A POOOOO”?, while bouncing up and down. Just as bears ? shit in the wood ??, so does Toby. That was fun finding a bin with those bundled wet wipes????. The boys fought and screamed as loudly as their little hyper-for-no-reason bodies could all the way home. Edith slept until the last 10minutes when she gracefully woke up for, you guessed it, another screaming fit☹️☹️☹️. Hooray.
In order to stay “holiday diet friendly” I’ve just suffered a bowl of cauliflower rice (who the fuck thought that heinous stuff up?) and cheap Asda packet curry???. Adam’s exact words were “thank you for trying sweetheart, but I don’t think we’ll buy that again will we?” ? No. No we won’t.
All in all today has been fucking abysmal and I am going to drink wine from the bottle… Totally nulling the effect of the cauliflower-bollocks… ??
How’s your day been?
H x
P.s – I adore the joy on my face in this picture, Toby is such a happy bunny, Edith is picking her nose and Reuben is hyper as fuck. He squeezed my boob just after this. ??
Best of all, you can join in too! I’ve asked my readers to join in too and their stories as HILARIOUS! Exactly the same as mine, the ups and downs, the temper tantrums and the tears, cuddle and kisses.
We’re sharing LIFE over on facebook, want to join in?
H x
You’re awesomely funny and love your witty disposition with your little basket cases!!!??? I have three! ?? One big mouth teenager of a boy who just turned 13, how on earth??? who won’t keep his mouth shut in front of the babies with his crap, shit, sucks, ass combo I get everyday???? love of my life, and my two angels who are one and two and say “me, me” all day ????? sums it up. And a dog who I swear pisses when no one is looking in little droplet forms to leave her fucking mark too!!!!
Not the only one losing my sanity then haha…Lilly’s not been too bad so far but we have had a fair few tantrums x
Hahaha, sorry for the parental struggles but like you said most days are better than others.
This sounds really great! Sometimes you just need that chat. I love that you’re readers are getting involved and sharing stories.
Jordanne || Thelifeofaglasgowgirl.co.uk
I bet it can be really stressful, but it must be great to have some support too.
Lol. I like how honest you are. It’s so refreshing. I can imagine many mums sugar coating this but you say it as it is. Lovely post.
Cauliflower rice isn’t that bad really, you just need to season it well and hide it in all sorts of other things – like diced chicken. 🙂 The summer holidays aren’t easy, are they!
This is such a fun way to document the daily goings on of motherhood. It sounds like you had a pretty chaotic day!
Great idea to set up the mini blog, I will check it out and share our stories too! 🙂
http://lilinhaangel.com/
I might have to join in on this, my instagram certainly doesn’t show the whole of our day ha ha, just the good parts about the summer holidays! They didn’t cover the tantrum about the wrong cup being used, pasta being covered in sauce , using the wrong coloured plate…. the list goes on…. and it is raining lol! x
Great idea! Summer holidays are tough, especially when the sun has decided not to join us!
Lol I love how uncensored you are, kids do the funniest things although it does not seem like it at the time. Its amazing how much havoc they can wreak in such a short space of time!
I love this! So refreshingly honest, I’m sure many, many parents will be glad to read your story!
Oh dear it look like your little boy wasn’t having his photo taken. I hope he cheered up. xx
That first pic is so cute, how cheeky!
It must be really tough to find enough to do to occupy the kids for the whole summer holidays x
That sounds like a fab idea! Would love to join in. The weather has been really bad so we haven’t managed to do much of our plans either. We had a good weekend though. x
Oh I really do not envy you, I remember these days very well, give yourself a pat on the back for surviving, and heres to another day x
Oh I’m feeling you! I don’t like to moan but I can’t wait for my eldest to go on a little organised trip tomorrow with his old nursery! I am so looking forward to a day of just me and the baby – with nap-times and peace!! x
This account brought back so many memories of my Summers with 3 children to entertain. In the end I stopped feeling guilty about wishing for school to start over again but we had some fun times despite the chaos which accompanied every trip out.
Love this idea – very real and honest parenting. I’ve struggled since the kids broke up. I work from home and trying to work when they’re around just ain’t happening.